Winds and Rain Galore.

Okay, so I've been away.  Like those disciples in the boat watching the winds and waves rock them back and forth, I have been stuck in my own storm wondering will I survive.  I hate rejection.  Anyone else out there know what I am talking about?  I hate not knowing, understanding or liking the answers either.  I'm in a perpetual storm and I am not quite sure when it will stop.  Part of me is scared to be completely honest.  I have seen many storms in my life and am actually pretty tired of riding them out.  Praying and looking for shelter in the only arms there to hold me, God's, is what keeps me going.

Then he got into the boat and his disciples followed him. Suddenly a furious storm came up on the lake, so that the waves swept over the boat. But Jesus was sleeping.The disciples went and woke him, saying, “Lord, save us! We’re going to drown!” He replied, “You of little faith, why are you so afraid?” Then he got up and rebuked the winds and the waves, and it was completely calm. The men were amazed and asked, “What kind of man is this? Even the winds and the waves obey him!” Matthew 8:23-27(NIV)

What kind of man is he that even the winds and waves obey him?  The kind that knows my sorrows, counts my tears (Psalms 56:8), He know my joys and my victories.  I know that He knows yours too, whatever the heartache is.  You are loved.  We don't face these struggles alone.  There are others who struggle with us.  And He is big enough to hold us all close to Him if we let Him.

There are times, many times I don't feel loved.  People are fickle creatures.  They have rules, expectations, concepts, judgements etc.  I am one of these.  And with being a fickle creation comes affecting the other fickle creatures here living with us on earth.  No man or women is truly an island to themselves.  We are interdependant creatures.  For some that scares them and for others that excludes them.  But we are all here together needing the others.  He made it that way on purpose.  He told Adam that He made Eve because it wasn't good for man to be alone.  So feeling like I need others is a natural healthy thing.  And to want to be needed is as well.  So if I had one wish tonight, one prayer would be that God help me see and others how to allow others to feel wanted, needed and loved.  It's not all about me.